X-Message-Number: 10954 From: Date: Mon, 21 Dec 1998 21:36:21 -0600 (CST) Subject: Getting beyond self-esteem I will only make a brief reply to some criticisms made of some thoughts I have posted recently. I still feel they are relevant to cryonics as we prepare for the future, but not if all that results is argument as opposed to debate: Thomas Donaldson seems to suggest (message #10945) that I advocate becoming "Eloi". This does seem to imply a black-or-white choice: Eloi or Not-Eloi, that is the question! (a la Hamlet). I suspect that there are probably going to be other options which will present themselves. After all, the future isn't here yet and the Eloi are merely a fiction. (Actually while I do not advocate BECOMING something - Eloi or Non-Eloi - , I wouldn't mind trying out ACTING like them for at least a few days in what I have been told is called a "vacation" - except for the part about being eaten by the Morlocks, of course). Again, it seems reasonable to me to project current trends into a future where machines will do better ANYTHING a human can do. If this bothers you but it happens anyway, what I am discussing here could become very important for you in overcoming that discomfort which I contend is self- imposed. (As a related aside, author H. G. Wells also wrote IN THE DAYS OF THE COMET. In that novel he posited that the social madness of humanity (as seen in wars, for example) is due to a chemical imbalance in the body affecting the emotions and mental judgement. When a stray comet enters the earth's atmosphere, the missing physical element is introduced into human physiology (through breathing) and all wars stop immediately. An interesting thought). Timor Rozenfeld (message 10946) also criticized my views on self-esteem. However though he correctly disagrees with my admittedly simplistic definition (for this arena), it is still in the context of whether one is "worthy of living". "Worthy" is again an evaluation, "esteeming" or measurement. This definition seems circular to me. (And I a card-carrying member of the First Church of Tautology!). I usually work from California psychotherapist Nathaniel Brandon's definition of self-esteem (as he seemed to have almost single-handedly launched this successful social meme about thirty years ago) in that self-esteem involves 2 factors: feeling "in principle" (Brandon's emphasis) competent to handle the affairs of one's life and feeling worthy of happiness. Competency is a measure of what you DO. Feeling WORTHY of happiness is also a self-evaluation (another action) given as to whether its "okay" to feel good or not. Both require a standard to measure up to. Timor Rozenfeld continues with suggesting that if one were not capable of succeeding in this world and not "deserving of happiness" then this would result in misery and stagnation. First, "succeeding" is itself an evaluation based on some arbitrary standard which the individual chooses to define and accept. Second, the individual must then BOTH decide to judge whether happiness is an issue of "deserving" (again, measuring up to some standard) or not "deserving", and then choosing what level of "worth" is required to "earn" that happiness. If the individual skips the identification of self with actions (what I personally consider to be only the FIRST step to psychological balance), then "success" is determined by selected goals without regard to a self-created personal "value" and, additionally, if the individual does not make happiness an issue of "worth", then his happiness will not be dependent upon earning that right. (Ghosts! Ghosts! I am haunted by Ghosts masquerading as nouns!). Anyway, despite the fact I believe the current popularity of self-esteem as an unchallengable axiomatic virtue to be already an atavistic hangover from primate "pack" consciousness (see THE LUCIFER PRINCIPLE: A SCIENTIFIC EXPEDITION INTO THE FORCES OF HISTORY by Howard Bloom; 1995: ISBN 0-87113-532-9), and that I also expect that as we move toward a much more pleasant and positive transhuman future beyond the common social psychoses which surround us (reification on almost every level to name just one human blindspot - more Ghosts!), I will simply suggest that reading IS OBJECTIVISM A RELIGION? by New York psychotherapist Albert Ellis (1968; Library of Congress Card Number 68-21132) better deals with more of these ideas regarding the "darkside" of self-esteem, in lieu of authentic self-acceptance. Ellis is a prolific writer so if you cannot find a copy of the above book (which is out of print but in many libraries), you can easily find most of the more important issues in this regard dealt with in some of his better books on psychotherapy (those aimed for other professional therapists). As most late twentieth century humans, I can and do make many mistakes (and don't use a spell checker nearly often enough - another mistake!) but in re-reading my last post could not see where I was doing anything more than expressing my opinion. I hope the above two suggested sources will be considered for a deeper understanding of what I have been talking about here. As for speaking "in a paternalistic and condescending tone", if you drop self-esteem you will not project these visions on my words. But since you seem to feel that way, I will quickly add the following: I am certain I am completely wrong and you are (both) completely right. (Feel better yet?) But the IDEAS I am suggesting here still make sense to me and I believe them to reflect the probable trend of events in our world. These IDEAS may prove to be correct, somewhat correct, somewhat off, or dead wrong. Self-esteem to me is placing a price tag on your soul which is then self-sold into slavery. Sooner or later the slaves always seem to get beaten. Given enough TIME, there will always come someone (or some THING! like a MACHINE!) faster on the draw to outshoot the best current gunslinger of the month. Maybe I'll write a book on the subject. Until then, I can recommend the books mentioned above. The way I see it, the trick is not to prove me wrong. The trick is not even to disprove my ideas. The trick is to be OPEN to what happens as the future unfolds. The trick is to NOT be so involved in defending an opinion that you don't notice the alligator that just ate it and is now looking directly at you as a dessert. If you can pull off that trick, then these words will have accomplished their intended goal. If not, big deal. I tried. -George Smith Rate This Message: http://www.cryonet.org/cgi-bin/rate.cgi?msg=10954