X-Message-Number: 1098 Date: Mon, 3 Aug 92 18:32:15 PDT From: (Daniel Green) Subject: Re: Obligations to Loved Ones in Suspension Charles brings up a real dilemma with no simple answer, ie how and when to *let someone go*. The *how* half of the question is without doubt the most difficult but how to answer *when* is clear to me, and that is at the time of their suspension. Let's face it, the chances of any of us ever being revived are very slim. Even if a couple were to be suspended and revived together, I doubt their relationship could handle the sheer strain of the certain monumental changes they would face. Regarding *how* to let go, I can only suggest trying to emotionally treat the suspension of a mate as you would a true death as much as possible. Try to accept that the person is gone and the relationship ended. The one nice side to this sad situation is the prospect of meeting *anyone* from your own time again. You can be certain that you will bond far more tightly to even your worse enemy from today that you may meet again in your revived world than you will to anyone else (try moving alone into a foreign culture to see what I mean). No, if you do meet a loved one again it will be a time for rejoicing, but it will also be a completely new game. - Daniel Green [ Daniel, here is something to complicate the situation. Message #845 mentions Mike Darwin's Nov. 1990 Cryonics magazine article titled "Communicating With Suspension Patients". In that article he gives several reasons why we should write to friends and loved ones in suspension. (Upon reanimation, they will really appreciate the updates on how their friends & loved ones turned out, it will make us feel good to communicate to the person in suspension, etc.) I then suggested an even more important reason; to NOT communicate to friends and loved ones in suspension would be the same as treating them as "dead and gone", which means that all our talk of suspension patients not being dead is, at an emotional level, just hypocrasy. Thus, your suggestion to treat a suspended mate as truly dead would be unsatisfactory, too. One alternative, though, would be to treat the mate as divorced, not dead. Also, people who are divorced often are not on speaking terms. :-) - KQB ] Rate This Message: http://www.cryonet.org/cgi-bin/rate.cgi?msg=1098