X-Message-Number: 20459 From: "Mark Plus" <> Subject: OCRegister: "Freezing: It's a sunny future" Date: Tue, 19 Nov 2002 19:50:26 -0800 http://www2.ocregister.com/ocrweb/ocr/article.do?id=12198§ion=ACCENT&year=2002&month=11&day=19 Tuesday, November 19, 2002 Freezing: It's a sunny future By JEFF KRAMER The Orange County Register The people who froze Ted Williams' head were in Newport Beach this weekend, and not a moment too soon. It gives me an excuse to say a few words in support of immortality - chiefly mine - and present coping strategies in the event that your own frozen melon is reactivated. (Today's Cryo-tip: Blowing air forcefully through your nose will cause your detached head to roll backwards.) If this all sounds far-fetched, it's because you didn't attend the fifth Alcor Conference on Extreme Life Extension at the Newport Marriott. (Suggested motto: "Death Is What You Make It.") Alcor happens to be the highly reputable firm that sticks dead people in tubes of liquid nitrogen for money. The idea is that someday science will advance to the point where you can be reheated and whatever killed you can be fixed, at which point you will owe $18 trillion in back taxes and Visa card interest. It's a heck of an idea, especially if you enjoy winter sports, whatever that means. The only reason I'm not an Alcor member myself is because I'm terrified of waking up 800 years from now and discovering that my 1994 Toyota Camry is still running perfectly. I want assurance that it will be like the good old days when cars were programmed to explode at 90,000 miles and you could buy a new one. Also, death may be the only way to escape the marketing of J. Lo. Of course, freezing corpses isn't the only viable life extension theory. Severely reducing calories has been shown to lengthen lifespans in animals, prompting discussion of applying the technique to humans. One elfin conferencee - responding to the concerns raised by a speaker - insisted that eating very little does not cause severe hunger and cold. "I don't get hungry and I enjoy food more than ever before," the man said - moments before he walked with great dispatch to a snack tray. "How many calories do you consume a day?'' I asked him. "About 1,800," he said, cradling a chocolate chip cookie the size of a Discman. He then referred me to his Web site, which I believe was www.ilikegermanchocolatecake.com. I was especially impressed with a lecture delivered by Max Moore, an Oxford-trained philosopher who asserted that living in the future could be - you'll want to jot this down - "challenging." Among his proposals was to make friends with people who are scheduled to be frozen "ahead of you" so you'll have someone to help you on the other side. Sample street corner exchange (Cleveland, 3043): New Thawee: Lance, is that you? Old Thawee: Duuuude! You made it! New Thawee: Man, I can't believe you're still driving that crappy Camry. Moore advised people to adopt flexible attitudes and undertake strange experiences as a way to prepare for the uncertainties of the future. "Go talk to someone who's weird or creepy," he suggested. Most of the attendees appeared to be doing just that. As for me, I've always been at ease with my impending immortality, especially this part: I'll be on vacation from March 1, 2897, to March 14, 9600. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- CONTACT US: (714) 796-6896 or Visit ocregister.kramervision. _________________________________________________________________ MSN 8 with e-mail virus protection service: 2 months FREE* http://join.msn.com/?page=features/virus Rate This Message: http://www.cryonet.org/cgi-bin/rate.cgi?msg=20459