X-Message-Number: 27284
From: "veronica sullivan" <>
Subject: suicide, time travel and mortality
Date: Fri, 28 Oct 2005 12:31:08 +1000

Dear all, 


This is just   a sad sorry rambling, It is one year since my very dear oldest 
son suicided. His autopsy   revealed his thyroid gland had shrunken down to 
nothing.  He suffered from severe hypothyroidism which was undetected on his 
visits to his medical   practitioner. Hypothyroidism produces a variety of 
symptoms, including weight loss, myalgia, arthralgia and severe depression.


My son was very clear that he did not wish to be frozen. In any case his body 
was not found for two weeks after he died and he was too far gone. It goes 
without saying that he really was a very lovely, intelligent young man.


I initially took solace in the fact that I could perhaps myself be frozen, come 
back in some future time, return and get him back. I have since learned we can 
only go forward in time and never go back.  Even if he existed in a parallel 
universe, I could never see him or visit as I would be destroyed instantly, 
unlike the sci-fi show Sliders.


I am so sorry for not responding to emails and staying in touch and notifying my
friends, Bob, Ben, Joe, Phil, Simon, Damien and others but I just have not had 
the volition to do so, in fact there are many friends and family who I haven't 
even told as I just cannot. My grief is immense and I am still going through the
motions of droll existence.


I do remain the eternal optimist and hope there are, remain and will be out 
there, visionaries and scientists stretching the outer limits, like Aubrey De 
Gray et al for us mere mortals on the road to death, by whichever means we get 
there, who can save us and one day return us.

Death sux, I hate losing my family and friends and I will never get used to it!


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