X-Message-Number: 2970 Date: 08 Aug 94 22:48:10 EDT From: Mike Darwin <> Subject: CRYONICS juicy gossip Here's some juicy gossip I just heard: "Mike Darwin's HIV status is unknown." You know what's the best thing about this gossip, it's true! My last HIV test was done on 01-18-1994 (for both HIV-1 antibody and HIV-P24 antigen). It was negative, or in the parlance of the lab that ran the test: non-reactive, non-reactive. Am I HIV-1 negative now? Who knows, I sure don't, and I won't until I have another test run, and even then a few percent of people do not show up antibody positive even when they have full blown disease. So, I now join the ranks of many others whose HIV infection status is not known: namely everybody but Magic Johnson, Liberace, and a few hundred thousand other people who have been unfortunate enough to die of AIDS or courageous enough to make their HIV-1+ status public. By now, you are (depending on upon *who* you are) probably wondering just what the hell this all about. I will tell you: Recently I spoke with a prospective BPI client who had some questions for me. While he was too polite to raise the issue with me, someone else had told me that this client had been told, in response to his stated preference for my services, that he should exercise caution because "Mike Darwin's HIV status is unknown." This would be funny if it weren't so pathetic. I should have titled this piece "At What Price Members?" The answer is, obviously, "any." While the prospective client declined to identify who he heard this "juicy" rumor from, I found out shortly anyway. I will the spare the person who is using it and his/her organization the embarrassment of disclosing the particulars here. I will also go on to note that this little bit of gossip actually provides me with an opportunity to say something important about choosing cryonics services in general, and BPI in particular. So, in that sense, it wasn't all a waste. First of all, if you are making cryonics arrangements with BPI via CryoCare or ACS because you expect the "great"* Mike Darwin to freeze you, you are probably kidding yourself for a number of reasons (unless you already terminally ill). Most of you making arrangements are my age or younger and I will likely be happily retired, dead and/or in the can myself before your turn comes. *I am one man, a man of fairly modest talents with many weaknesses and I am not "great" by any means. I have no desire to be great, or esential, or irreplaceable, or the only guy who can do cryonics well for the forseeable future. If any of those things are true, then I've failed miserably because the *real* talent to come in cryonics isn't on the scene yet -- I only hope that I can pass on what I know (which I admit, given the current state of the art is considerable) and contribute to the knowledge of *those who will freeze me.* If I can't and don't, then its my tough luck more than anybody else's (at least from my perspective). Secondly, I have a saying based on a look-see at history and my own sad experience: "Those who men would utterly destroy, they first make heros." No thanks. Been there. Seen that. Done that. The point of this little rumor was, of course, to make the point (quite rightly so) that I am only one man and, being queer, might get a loathesome venereal disease and die of it. This is actually quite an accurate observation, if not a particularly tastefully presented one. In fact, of more immediate concern is the blowout I had on my right fron tire in my beat-up '81 VW rabbit disel pickup truck on the freeway a few weeks ago (which I commute over 50 miles a day in). That unsafe rat-trap of a car is a more immediate hazard to BPI and me than if I become HIV infected tomorrow. The point is "I could die." *I* know this already, and you should too. So, why sign on with BPI? Is BPI just Mike Darwin? Well, if it is we're both in trouble. And I and Steve Harris, and Sandra Russell, and Paul Wakfer and Naomi Reynolds and lot of other people have been wasting their time. Steve and Sandra in particular since they just spent over 14 hours standing around doing canine surgery and cryoprotective perfusion and learning the ropes. (I wish to report that Steve did a nearly flawless job of putting the dog on bypass -- I only put in the pressure monitoring purse string -- we got the dog glyced and deglyced from 6+Molar too!). If you sign on with BPI you should sign on because we offer a good service now that meets your needs *AND* because we are taking the kind of steps that indicate that we are going to continue to offer a good service, whether any one of us is in the can or not. You can also sign on because you believe we deserve the support for the research we are doing (3 dogs this week alone) and because we are doing it well. Having said the above, I would also point out that if I drop dead tomorrow things would not be so good here in River City (especially not for me). Certainly one major hole in BPI's capability is the lack of people with the deep interest in running the business, which currently exists. This is one of BPI's liabilities and everybody who is considering our services should know that. But then that is true of all cryonis organizations right now. Every organization that I know of is heavily dependent upon a few individuals for its good performance and survival. In some ways I'm in better shape than some because if I do die -- suddenly or slowly, there are plenty of committed people around who will find BPI in their laps and who I think will do well with it -- although not with enthusiam at first. As far as technical skills go, I am replaceable now on the basics and I will be replaceable in other areas soon too. As to my HIV-1 status. Hell, I could seroconvert tomorrow. My sex life is my own business but I'll tell you right up front I'm no saint. I also pump cryonics cases and in doing so have twice been exposed: aerosolized blood in the eyes once, and a towel clamp stick just recently). Them's the risks. If you can't handle 'em, sign on with some other service provider. Oh yeah, but be sure and get an HIV screen, EKG, aging biomarkers analysis and actuarial evaluation on their key people. And above all, make sure they don't do AIDS cases and that you don't get it, either. Rate This Message: http://www.cryonet.org/cgi-bin/rate.cgi?msg=2970